About Me

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Concord, California, United States
I am a sometimes-writer, everyday mama, creative failure and experimental cook. I am interested in living a beautiful life, spending time with my family and making things that I can feel proud of. When I'm by myself I'm usually outside. Don't bother calling because chances are that I didn't bring my cell phone because I couldn't find it. If you see me walking, it's because I lost my keys and if you see me with only one child... I'm probably in big trouble.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

I've been a little bit of a monster lately.

But I'm not sorry.

Things have been very stressful lately and it all comes down on me. I have to take Bunny crying to school every day. I have to pull her from the car. I have to force her to walk in. EVERY DAY. On Wednesdays I will have to leave the girls in aftercare at the school from 2:30-3:15 (Wed. is their early day out). Yesterday both of my children sat there sobbing hysterically, petrified that I wasn't coming for them. I don't know why this happened being that we talked about it every day for a week before it happened. But, I had to deal with it. Then, I had to to walk my screaming child a mile home, immediately work on homework, immediately scramble to make dinner, clean dinner up and do dishes, get jays food ready for the next day (which he didn't bring), prep breakfasts, do laundry, stories and clean up the little disasters that happen as I'm making dinner.

It's too much. And I resent Jay when I see him sitting there with his socks and shoes off, feet propped up, relaxing on his computer just the way he always would.

So, last night, after a conversation with Bunny about school I totally exploded.

And I have no guilt or remorse for my explosion. I feel that it was well deserved.

Also, we've got to do something about Bunny. I have been waiting for Jay to tell me what therapists will accept our insurance, but I think I'll have to just open the yellow pages and start calling around. I'll bet that our pediatrician could refer us to someone. I hadn't thought of that previously.

Bunny is falling apart. She tells us daily that she hates herself. She writes "Kaitlyn is a Loser" over and over on paper. It's the most heartbreaking thing ever. She's so petrified of her teacher that she can't function in class... and her teacher has been entirely uncommunicative with me. So far as I can tell, she's a giant stone wall. I have emailed and received no response and then I have followed up in person and gotten attitude. I have sent notes in Bunny's folder and gotten promised to email later (which she didn't do). Soooooooo...

I'm sure that she's a nice lady and everything... but it's time to switch teachers.


  1. hmmmm...sounds like we need to talk. call me. should have my new digits on your phone.

  2. I don't know that I do. Do I?

    Did you call me today? I got a number from a number that I didn't recognize and I was with a customer and the call came through all of the speakers in the store again because my iphone was playing music! Lol. I get really flustered when things like that happen!!!!

  3. crap! i need to just stop calling you during the day. haha! yes, i am sure it was me. *sheepish look* sorry!!!