About Me

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Concord, California, United States
I am a sometimes-writer, everyday mama, creative failure and experimental cook. I am interested in living a beautiful life, spending time with my family and making things that I can feel proud of. When I'm by myself I'm usually outside. Don't bother calling because chances are that I didn't bring my cell phone because I couldn't find it. If you see me walking, it's because I lost my keys and if you see me with only one child... I'm probably in big trouble.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011


Did you know that we've been trying to have a baby?

We started fertility treatments last year. Even with the help of some pretty savvy reproductive endocrinologists (who swore to me that I had the ovaries of a 18 year old girl and that I shouldn't have any trouble getting pregnant again) I wasn't able to have another baby. Of course, we could try indefinitely, but the stress of infertility, the wear and tare of fertility drugs on my body and the financial strain told us to call it quits and look at other options.

I really want my family to grow.

So, we've started the process of trying to adopt. We're just in the information stages now. We're not great candidates for straight adoption because we have two biological children (which sort of puts us at the bottom of the need pile) so we're looking into fostering to adopt. Jay's aunt has three children who she fostered to adopt and I began talking with her a lot about it. I love the idea of doing this, though I admit to feeling nervous because kids in foster care always have a reason for being there... and I worry that I don't have the skills to cope with these special needs. Also, I worry that we'll have babies coming in and out of Bunny and Lila's lives, each time thinking that they'll be ours forever.

Presently we're in the information gathering stages of this. We are going to take the classes and learn as much as we can about it and then we'll see where the journey takes us. Maybe it will lead us to a new Holler... and maybe it won't. My heart is open and we definitely have room for more here.

I have to admit that I like the idea of adopting in lieu of making a new person. There are so many children out there who need loving families and we have such a great life that is welcoming and nurturing. There is little in life that I love as much as parenting. It's definitely my calling.

I think that this will be a long process, but I'm really looking forward to the adventure! Who knows, maybe there is someone out there right now, pregnant with a baby she's not going to be able to keep. And maybe that baby is being born for our family. Maybe it needs us as much as we need it.


  1. What a beautiful way that would be to grow your family! keep us updated for sure!

  2. WOW. that is awesome, anna!

    have you thought about adopting from another country? a blog friend has an adopted son from uganda & 2 more she's in the process of adopting. her story is inspiring. http://momentswithlove.blogspot.com/

    anyway, call me soon. love ya!

  3. Hey, does she have other children? I did look into adopting a baby from Haiti but we don't meet the criteria. You have to be over 35 and you can't have any biological children. So, we fail. In general, unless you have $100,000 to spend, it's really difficult to have a straight adoption when you already have children who are not adopted. There's a bias that exists. Also, adopting internationally can often be very, very, very, very daunting. So, I'm not opposed to it, but I'd prefer to adopt locally.

    Erika! I'll totally keep you updated! I'm so excited to write about this.

  4. Oh Laura, I would love to call you but my phone is not working. I'm feeling a little bit defeated about phones. I don't see the point in getting another one. Jay says that I just need cans and a string.

  5. she had 4 bio children before adopting the first, and raised most of the money through donations. i know she will answer questions you have via email. i think every african nation is different, so, worth looking into different ones.

  6. WOW, that's awesome. I've always been baffled by how much it is to adopt. It seems like it shouldn't have such a big price tag to give a needing baby or child a loving home. Some things I will just never understand. i think this is awesome and look forward to hearing more :)

  7. Laura, I'll write to her! That's really great to know. Thanks for the hook-up!

    Nikkol, I know. Given how expensive it is to raise children, you'd think that adopting wouldn't be so much. It's all legal fees. I'll never understand it.

    We just spent so much money on infertility. It sort of put things in perspective for me. I'd like to spend my money on the family I have and not the family I'm trying to have. I feel sick when I think of the thousands of dollars we just wasted when all it bought me was a lot of heartache.